“ Friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth ”
July 2, 2009
6 notes
Why is this person standing so close to A GIANT WAVE? via.
Why is there **nobody** SURFING ON THIS!!!!
He's Finally Gone!!!
This guy won less games for us than he helped us lose. I hope Dumars teaches you how to handle the ball.
“ A winning routine is important for success. My winning routine consists of eating, sleeping, and waking up ready to dominate. ”
Shaq
“ Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it. You know, I just… do things. The mob has plans, the cops have plans, Gordon’s got plans. You know, they’re schemers. Schemers trying to control their little worlds. I’m not a schemer. I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control things really are. ”
The Joker, The Dark Night
“ [Dude], I got drunk the night before Jonas’ wedding and pissed the bed with my phone in my pocket. The next morning I drove drunk to Verizon, the lady opens up the phone to get to the battery and my piss comes dumping out—”This is not covered by warranty,” she said. Needless to say, I put it in a bag of rice which sucked all the moisture, and the smell, out of the phone and it operates fine. Just remove the battery from phone and put [the phone and the rice] in a bag. ”
SCAT GOT
He Burned Down Heaven?!?!??!?!?!?!
Some asshole burned down a topless coffee shop. Read: TOPLESS COFFEE SHOP. This arson needs to be stoned to death.